Perturbed

Frightened-

absolutely frickin' frightened.

That's how I felt the moment I realized 

that I wanted to kiss someone other than you.

I didn't think there would be someone other than you.

What bothered me most was that the basest

of that momentary want wasn't just physical 

attraction. 

Fuck, am I just vulnerable?

I've known vulnerability- but this kind specifically, is scaring me.

I know it's too soon for this, almost four weeks. But that fact doesn't change anything.

Is it his kindness?

Is it his thoughtfulness?

Is it his humor?

Damn it, what's wrong with me?

...

...

...

I can't trust myself.